My Bible reading for today (thanks to my new Bible Gateway app) was Judges 1-3 and Luke 4:1-30. It may seem like a chance pairing, but those exact two passages were, oddly enough, exactly what I needed to hear today. I have felt a question rising in my heart these last few days... Is it worth it? There are some issues I am slogging through in my personal life that just don't seem to be getting any better, and I feel like I've been dealings with them for a long time now. So I wonder, will things ever improve, and if they don't, is it worth it?
I haven't been doing my devotions much since we are travelling, but I knew I had to read tonight because these questions were going to eat me up until I got an answer. I needed some truth to strengthen my faltering will, and I got it, custom-made for me. You see, Judges 1-3 talks of Caleb, his brother Othniel, and Caleb's daughter. Just before I got pregnant with Raccoon, I read a book called Caleb's Quest, which is all about making God-given dreams come true. I was at a point in my life three years ago where I was seeing the end of all my hopes and dreams. This book was instrumental in giving me the courage to continue and the faith to believe that in time, God would give me a new dream. Luke 4 is when Jesus reads from Isaiah 61 in his home-town synagogue. Both of these passages are my promises of hope from the Lord for my future. For Him to give them to me again tonight as I was feeling discouraged and ready to give up - the very same ones he had given me before in my darkest times - touched me deeply.
It was like a personal note from God saying, "I have not forgotten you. I hear you crying out to me and I will deliver you. Jesus knew his sacrifices, big and small, were worth it. When he was alone, misunderstood, forgotten, forsaken, in pain. He passed through all of those things. But in the end, it was worth it for him. And yes, it will be worth it for you, too. Stand firm. Continue. There are good plans awaiting you. Be faithful. Don't give up. Hang on, you're almost there. I will never leave you. I will never forget you. No matter how many time you mess up and lack faith, I'll be there when you call. I hear you. I care."